2018 · 2019 · new year · reflection · resolutions · Uncategorized

Tips on how to have a great year & my goals for 2019.

2018 only has hours left and then we are presented with a brand new year. A year to make our own…

These are my tops tips on how to make 2019 a great year! Yes every year will have hardships and challenges, but we can strive to still make it great and just remember hard times build strength and character!

  1. Review 2018… Go back over the last year, work out what worked best for you and what didn’t. What people lifted you up and who was toxic? What habits made you feel better and which made you feel worse? Assess every aspect of your life, note down what worked and didn’t. Be mindful of these entering the new year and try to do more of the good in 2019.
  2. Set your focus. For some people resolutions work best, for others vision boards, prophetic words or phrases. Whatever works best for you, set it.
  3. Improve your health in someway. We should always work towards better health, perhaps this year you can focus on eating better, drinking more water, visiting the doctor for that check up you keep putting off, quitting a bad habit, seeing the dentist – whatever it is – make it a priority – our health is so important.
  4. Be active – this goes along with point 1, but reflect on your past year and work out what activity you enjoyed most and do more of it! It could be walking, hiking, maybe the gym motivates you, family bike rides or yoga – being active is so incredibly important.
  5. Improve where you live – our living environment reflects and effects our mental state. Work out ways to positively impact your environment, perhaps try organising your home more, decluttering, making a cleaning schedule etc.

So how do I plan to make 2019 a great year?
By following this…

Ice Cream Party (3)

2018 was a huge year for us, it was huge, busy, chaotic, stressful, exciting, worrying, upsetting and fun and I’m tired from it, so tired.
2019, I want to slow us down, I want to rest, I want less chaos.
In this new year I want to be intentional.
Intentional with my faith, marriage, parenting, words, our money, my choices, my health, my thoughts – just overall be more intentional.
I want to slow everything down, 2019 will still be a big year for us with LuLu starting prep but I want to try TRY and have a calm & slow year. So implementing more organisation, planning & simplifying into our lives, avoiding unnecessary stress & drama, saying “no” more and just allowing space for more quiet in my life.
I also want to grow in 2019, I feel I’ve grown tremendously in the last 2 years – every year we evolve but this year I want to channel my growth into certain areas… I want to grow  in my faith, I pray for more patience and wisdom for my mothering, I want to grow ModernWifeLife31, I can’t physically grow any taller – haha – but I do want to continue to grow personally & emotionally. Every year I aim to grow more, learn more and become stronger.
So that’s my focus for 2019.
I know what bought me great stress & heartache in 2018 and I plan to steer clear of it in the new year. I plan to continue working on improving my health with my specialist, I also want to see a doctor about my back as I have scoliosis, I need to book us all in to see a dentist for a check up and I know we need a skin check up too!
Yoga and walking is something I want to do more of. I really enjoy the calmness of yoga and a yoga class is a nice treat for myself, we live in a nice area and I want to take advantage of that and go for more walks and make it a weekly habit.
As for our home, I feel I am going into 2019 with a clean and organised home – I’ve spent the time between boxing day and new years eve cleaning and organising our home, our space has been reset and we are ready to enter 2019. But we will continue to work on landscaping our block and decorating our home. I also want to continue to declutter our home.
But that’s about it, I have my same general list I stick to each year as well which you can read on THIS blog. 

Well friends, in a few short hours 2019 will be here, I hope 2018 is a year you can look back on fondly even if it’s just knowing you’ve left stronger than how you entered it. And I pray 2019 is a beautiful & great year for you.

Happy New Year, Bring on twenty nineteen! (This is the last year in our lifetime that we will have a year ending in teens!)

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2017 · life · positivity · reflection · Sunday series · truth

Sunday series on a Friday… {Contentment}

Hey friends,

Let’s talk contentment… Being content., happy where you are, at peace with what you’ve got – you know the deal.
I shared the other night on insta-stories that I found tremendous peace with where I am currently at with my little blog. In this “online world” every single thing is numbers, it matters greatly how many views, followers, likes, shares, etc – everything, every single number matters and you know what… I’m kind of a bit done with having it be that way. I am sick of watching my numbers go up and down. And wondering what I am doing wrong or right. Bottom line is, I am me – I put out the content I feel I need to and what I want to share. Like me or don’t like me, that’s fine.
I said in that post that I am aware I’m a small fish in a big pond & I’m fine with that, that suits me fine – I’m like 5ft/5ft 1 – being little suits me.
That very next morning I woke up to an inner voice trying to tell me, I’m small because I’m not worthy to be anything else… You know the voice, that voice that comes into your mind and undermines your positive thoughts, the voice that tries to drown out the quiet and loving voice we should all be listening for – you know the one, the voice that means nothing good.
And I let it eat at me, it got me down briefly.
And then I realised my worthiness, my contentment & joy isn’t found in that negative voice – it’s found in the one that’s whispering to me, reminding me about the Mums I have encouraged, the positive messages I get weekly, the beautiful connections I’ve made, reminding me of what I have achieved in my “online career” and assuring me what I put out there is useful and needed in this world of many voices. My voice maybe small, but my message matters.
I think this can be compared to so many scenarios in our everyday life, we feel content and then a voice of doubt creeps in, we compare, we lose that joy and secure feeling and suddenly we aren’t happy, we are envious and we are negative.
Paul wrote in Philippians 4:11-13
“I am not saying this because I am need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstance. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do all this through Him who gives me strength.”

That is spot on, Jesus is the one who gave me my contentment and it wasn’t His voice trying to fill my mind with doubt. But that of the enemy.
I pray you remember this when a negative voice tries to drown out your positive and content thoughts.

content
I’m so content with my 2 little loves.

I hope this post encouraged you today friends…
Each of our lives and paths are different, but we are all where we are meant to be and still slowly moving to where we are intended to be, all part of a greater plan. We can either be content and at peace with that or be miserable. I chose the joy, each and every darn time, because I want a joy filled life. Even if my current place isn’t the ideal in my mind or the times life is a bit chaotic or hard, I don’t control the end game – that’s out of my hands, but I have faith.
So yes, I will keep striving for more, working and aiming higher – but that doesn’t mean I am not content with where I am. I am grateful for my little platform and I’m thankful you are here to read my post.
Thank you.
Are you feeling content with where you are at?
What are you working towards currently?

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2017 · honesty · housewife · how to · life · motherhood · mothering · parenting · positivity · real · reflection · wife life

13 tips on how to reset as a Mumma & remain happy…

She’s strong, but she’s exhausted. – r.h. sin.

Hey friends,

Today I come to you weary, exhausted & sleep deprived…
(So I do apologise if they post gets rambly & makes little sense.)
A certain little mister has decided to test out how little sleep Mumma needs to survive… Sleep deprivation is torture – one I would never survive – because I suck at being a human when I haven’t had sleep. Now I don’t need a great deal of sleep, but I do need at least 4/5 hours of unbroken sleep – heck even 3 is good enough… Otherwise I just don’t function right, my tolerance levels & patience grows incredibly thin and you know if you are a parent, you need high levels of those to survive!
So anyway, my current state has inspired me to write a blog post today on…13 ways.jpgHow to reset as a Mumma & stay happy…
We all need a hand sometimes, we all have rough days that test us so much we almost break (or even do) And this is ok, it happens. But the important thing is to remember not to stay in that place… To make a conscious effort to reset & refocus on being happy…

  • Communicate & connect. Talk to your husband/partner/friend/tribe – whoever! Let them know where you are at. Take up offers of help. Trent & I don’t have a large support network – to be honest we have zero outside help, but we do have each other and we share the parenting workload evenly… He helps me so much when I am running on empty. A good chunk of the time I am the one keeping everything going, but when I am struggling he swoops in and saves me. He is incredible at getting up at night with the kids when I need help, because he knows I am terrible at life if I don’t sleep… Be honest with your husband/partner at where you are at, he can’t help if he doesn’t know.
  • Create close friendships/gather a tribe… You don’t need many friends, just 1 or 2 that get you, but if you are fortunate enough to have tribe – that is awesome too! Thankfully I have my best friend that I can have a good chat (whinge session) to about my current struggles and it is always so reassuring to have someone who understands & supports you without judgement and will listen during those real & honest talks. Aren’t Mumma friends the best?! I am so thankful for my Motherhood soulmate! (my latest column in Highfields’ style talks about this, you can find it HERE)
  • Make Mumma time a priority… Whether it be just driving to the store & doing groceries on your own, journalling, watching a movie, going to gym/church/a cafe on your own, taking a hot bath or walking the dog alone – do something for you. Do something where you won’t be interrupted (or hardly) and reset yourself… (Best time to do this is when your husband is home or you can get a babysitter/grandparents to watch the kids!) 
  • Take care of you, so you can take care of others… This point goes along with the one before, but you cannot pour from an empty glass… Keep your cup full. Take care of you!! In whatever way you need, make your mental, physical, spiritual and emotional health a priority! Take care of yourself in a way that works for you! And Mumma, give yourself some grace! Stop being so darn hard on yourself!
  • Get out… As stay at home mums we are often just that, at home! I don’t often venture out with the 2 kids on my own, but when Trent is on days off we try to get out and do things as much as possible… This changes up our environment and recharges us a bit.
  • Remember your kids are and will be ok… Everyone has moments in parenting they cringe at or regret. Moments we yelled too loud or acted in a way we wish we didn’t… Your kids will be fine, it was only a moment. And if your kids are mad at you, remember they will live – having your kids be mad at you pretty much comes with parenting, it means you are parenting! You don’t have to be their friend every second. (If you react in a way you instantly regret or aren’t proud of towards your children, show your kids that it is good to be remorseful & apologise, explain feelings to them & how you felt overwhelmed. Be open & honest, you are setting an example on how to cope in a tough scenario. * example; “I am sorry I yelled so badly at you when you spilt your cereal. Mummy got frustrated & got mad too quickly, I realise that is was an accident & I am sorry.”)
  • Keep a happy heart & start each day fresh… Don’t hold onto bad behaviour, yes stick to punishments but don’t dwell on what’s happened. Move on. Strive to wake up every morning with a positive mindset and a happy heart…
  • Comparison is the thief of joy… Don’t compare, it is easy to see the instagram accounts and think “that mum has it together”… But everyone has struggles, their struggles maybe entirely different to yours but they exist. Keep in mind everyones social media account is their own edited version of their existence.
  • Get your priorities in order… Really weigh up what is important to you and your family. If you are burning yourself out trying to keep up with 10 different toddler activities during a week, is it worth it? Is exhausting yourself & making you cranky worth it? Everyones priorities will vary, so work out what works for your family. And learn to say NO – no to expectations, requests and even your kids. You do not have to do it all or be there for every single person.
  • Let it go, let it go… Go with the flow, some days are going to be absolutely incredible and some you will just want to cry. Go with it and pick your battles.
  • Savour the moment… One day you will long for this day back, don’t wish it away. Being in the trenches of motherhood is rough, but it’s beautiful and I am willing to bet one day you will look back on this fleeting season so fondly.
  • Remember you aren’t alone… Every Mumma has moments of great & hard times. Some moments we are a glowing, happy, engaged, doting mother who is fully focused on her kids and we are loving every second of motherhood. We wish these days would last forever. Then we experience the exhaustion, the feeling of barely being able to wake up because you are so tired and you swear you just shut your eyes, because you did! You feel like you are so touched out and just want to be alone in silence for 5 minutes – because silence & isolation sounds like a dream at this point. You feel like at any given moment you may just lose your mind because being over tired makes you a person you don’t really like. That mother exists too. Everyone has their own struggles, everyone (In one form or another…). I wish I was the first mother every single moment of my children’s lives – but I’m not, occasionally I am the second. Some days it’s challenging, but what counts is how we handle ourselves. Acknowledge it is a tough day/week/leap/month and work out a way to handle it… Go into survival mode, vent, ask for help, let it go – do what works for you, but know you are not alone. No one has a perfect day everyday and it’s ok for your day to not be perfect.
  • Treat yourself… Buy the flowers, buy the chocolate, buy the wine, get your hair done or buy the shoes. You are important – spoil yourself. (Because honestly, somedays you just need too!)

What is your best tip for resetting your mind after a stressful day/week? How do you maintain happiness as a Mumma? I would love to know, please comment below or on my social media!
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honesty · new year · reflection

Happy New Year. {Reflection on 2015}

A lot can happen in a year.

I am typing this on the 2nd last day of 2015… 2015 is almost done, what? I swear I was just typing my 2015 resolutions up… But here we are right on the cusp of 2016, it is almost here and to be honest I am kinda glad… 
As I type this I have a candle burning and a glass of champs – because we are talking about this year and about a New Year and things may get all feely and nothing brings out the feels like bubbles and candles… To be honest, the glass of champs may turn into glasses… 
So, in honour of farewelling 2015, I thought I would sum this year up…
In a few words it was;
Lovely. Fun. Beautiful. Hard. Heartbreaking. Frustrating. Challenging and Glorious. 
But that’s life isn’t it? 
A glorious, beautiful fun mess that can break your heart one second and make you want to jump for joy the next. Well, that’s how it is for me…
I said before I am kinda glad 2015 is over, the past few months for us have been rough. Actually this years kind of been challenging. But the last few months have been exceptionally ridiculous in the “can it get any worse” state… Like it went from bad, to horrifically depressing, to one punch after another. Just as we were struggling to pull ourselves up it felt like we were being slammed back down… That’s been the feeling for these past few months, like we just cannot catch a break. But we are confident 2016 is a better year for us. 
I cannot wait to embrace 2016, I am waiting for it to arrive and when it gets here, it is getting one big “praise the Lord you are here” hugs – and I am not a hugger. 
Before it arrives though let’s shine the light on this year… 
During 2015;

I started a new blog, Modern Wife Life 31. We completed another year of parenting. Were blown away by the most amazing little human in the world and thank God every day for her. Went on our first family holiday. LuLu saw the beach and swam in the ocean for the first time. Dealt with our daughter being unwell for the first time. Completed a 4km fun run as a family. LuLu & I took part in a protest march to support Trent’s job. Ate venison for the first time. I won a photography competition. I got my firearms license. Purchased 2 new guns. Went deer hunting & got a deer with Trent on Mother’s Day. Weaned LuLu at 20months and 3 days. Saw snow for the first time as a family (Trent and I had never seen it before). I turned 27. Started moving towards living a slower and simpler life. We moved LuLu into her big girl room. Celebrated our darling girl turning 2. Welcomed back people into our lives. Dealt with unimaginable pain that we wish on no one. Had my first “paid” article published on NineMSN. Let go of people who weren’t good for us. I cut my hair off. We showed LuLu real life deer. Had an image I took published on a newsletter that is circulated through out our local region. Celebrated Christmas. Remained strong despite everything we have faced. Prayed, prayed hard – through the good and the bad we prayed and stayed thankful.

2015 has been a year of learning. Learning that we can’t plan life and it will rarely go the way we think it should. Somethings that happen in life can’t be fixed, sometimes pain doesn’t heal – you just learn to live with it. I learned that in life, you can be so full of joy one day and devastated the next and more often than not the things that devastate us are out of our control. I’ve learned that things do happen for a reason and when they are happening we can never see why, eventually it makes sense though. I know that anyone can get through rough times, as long as you have the attitude to keep searching for the good and you are surrounded by those that you love and that love you. 
This year had more good than bad, but the bad seemed to all roll in at the end and just keep knocking us down… But we’ve dusted ourselves off, we’ve stood up and 2016 is ours.

I know this is a New Years post and with New Years post you are meant to include resolutions, but I haven’t finalised mine yet… Mine will most likely stay similar to my goals for 2015 that I wrote about here…  But they will be included in a post in the New Year…
What are your resolutions? 

Well, I think I should head to bed – I’ve had an exhausting day of totally deep cleaning my entire house with LuLu, I decided there is no better way to bring in the new year than a nice clean home complete with freshly washed bedding – so I am going to go crawl into bed and read a book.
I hope you enjoy your last day of 2015.
I pray 2016 is a year for you filled with joy and magic, peace and laughter and of course love. I hope your dreams come true and you experience good madness and your heart is full of happiness. I hope you surround yourself with people who think you are wonderful and that you adore. I hope you get to read many great books and create something you love. Most of all I hope 2016 is a year that you take time for you, you step out of your comfort zone – even if it’s just a toe outside of it and that you surprise yourself. Be courageous and confident – 2016 is 366 new chances to go after what you want, to do what you wish and live the life you dream of. 
I thank you all so much for your support during my first year back blogging. 
Stay safe and cheers.

I survived because fire inside me burned brighter than the fire around me. – Joshua Graham.